Those who plan get better results. When you are shattering your goals and things are working according to plan, you can boast about character and good judgement. That is a good time to reflect. It is easier to flow with the wind when it flows in your direction but the best time to test your strength is when the wind is contrary. Can the wind be contrary? Yes it can, not because you don’t plan or pray but because you are human.
I am delighted to introduce my new book, Feathers of Hope. Feathers of Hope is a perfect gift of hope you can give yourself or anyone you love and care about who places a high premium on self-development and relationship building. It is a practical guide to self-discovery and rediscovery. This handbook is particularly unique as it provides you with an inspirational message for each of the 365 days that make a year. Culled from my daily teachings, this book will help you navigate life’s challenges and strengthen your relationship with people towards achieving lasting success. If you are looking for a perfect gift for yourself and your loved ones, Feathers of Hope is handy, insightful, perpetually useful and it nourishes your typical day with a message of hope that keeps you going all year round.
When reality dawns, the thing you never imagined could happen becomes a topical issue. That is a good time to appreciate the omnipresence of the Almighty as the only all-knowing God. The news was shocking but it is real, after all, that Pastor Taiwo has transited. His good life was long enough. Some people come into your life and become simply irresistible. Such was the story of Pastor Taiwo in my life. I came to Fountain of Life Church as a wedding guest in 1999. My wife (then my fiancée) invited me to her friend’s elder sister’s wedding. I had my local church at the time. It only took Pastor Taiwo to give the message to the newly wedded couple and I surrendered to his spiritual mentorship without any prompt. After the message, I looked at my wife and she looked at me. The message was clear. We have found our local church. It was never about him. It was all about Jesus. Pastor Taiwo did not build the church around himself. He never allowed anyone to elevate him beyond his God-given assignment. He did not share in God’s glory. He was quick to direct the gaze of his congregation to God and not himself.
Fathers are meant to love, yet they are meant to be strong but according to Izogie, “love makes you weak”. In other words, to love and be strong is tough. It sounds more like a paradox but before you hasten to critique the contradiction, let me tell you who Izogie is. This is so that your judgement may be balanced. The Woman King is an African movie, rich in culture, perfectly scripted, excellently delivered. It is the story of the liberation of Dahomey people from the Oyo Empire by the women warriors, the Agojies. Jimmy Odukoya played one of the lead roles as Oba Ade, leading the Oyo Empire warriors. I must say his delivery was top notch. Nanisca was a woman warrior, a war general. She was assisted by Igozie to command the palace guards. You are probably wondering the correlation between The Woman King and fatherhood. Just a moment. Nawi, a 19 year old girl was about to be betrothed by her ‘father’ as a wife to a rich man who promised her physical abuse in good measure. Nawi would not have any of that. She revolted and her father, in anger, gifted her to the King.
To students of history, June 12 represents many things in the annals of Nigeria’s history. Call it the good, the bad and the ugly, but reminiscing this journey, one can now say, and safely too, that with June 12, 1993, Nigeria failed forward. Oftentimes, it sounds right to forget the past and move forward, particularly when it is bad or ugly, but that relates more to the ideal. In reality, it is difficult to move forward without a good sense of history. I wrote an article on June 12 and the National Question in 2018, shortly before the 2019 general elections. That article was published by Punch Online on 21 June 2018. The issues I raised in the article are worth your time. It is here attached:
Today marks another landmark in the annals of Nigeria’s history as we transit from a democratically elected government to another democratically elected government. In the wake of the endSARS protest in 2020, I wrote an article where I spoke about the real revolution. I charged Nigerian youths to take their protest from the street to the polling booth. The article is here attached for reference. I titled it the pains, the gains and the nation: In that article, I charged the youths to put a face to their struggle. I reminded them of the enormous power in their hands which they use for the wrong reasons. In the 2023 general election, His Excellency, Mr Peter Obi, happened to be the face of the aspirations of angry youths who desire a better Nigeria, albeit with exaggerated assumptions. I remember admonishing the youths in that same article that power is not served a la carte. Thinking that the youths can displace the experienced politicians at the centre appeared achievable but it is not a tea party.
The best time to be humble is when you are famous. It sounds easy but it is not as easy as it sounds. Difficult as it is, humility should be your second nature, particularly when your name travels faster than the bearer of the name. Few years back, I had an experience with a gospel artist, a celebrity, that keeps ringing in my head anytime humility is the subject. That experience reminded me that if one fails to manage fame, he could be living on exaggerated identity. This young and talented gospel artist was invited as a guest minister for a programme in my church. I happened to be the protocol officer detailed on him on that occasion, a volunteer job in the church. Being my principal, I was responsible for assisting him and seeing to his needs for as long as the programme lasted until he departs the church premises. Time to leave, after the programme, he became troubled. He kept calling his driver but the driver was not anywhere near. His driver probably did not envisage that the programme would end earlier and went on a cruise.
If you are used to saying yes all the time, it is not easy to say no but no is an answer. No may not be an affirmative word but it does not connote outright negativity too. This is not forgetting that some negatives actually translate to positive. Example is HIV negative. There are more, if you do a quick scan. Given a second opportunity, some things you hitherto said yes to will attract a no answer from you. Likewise, the no you said before could turn to a yes if you had more time to think through it before you gave your verdict. Time has a role to play in decision making, depending on the weight of what your decision can birth and the possible implications. This is why you should be mindful of being stampeded to say yes to a request because you didn’t have enough time to process the information.
I imagine a world without competition, life will be so dull, isn’t it? Of a truth, life without competition will not only be uneventful, it will be uninspiring. Competition breeds invention, particularly when it is healthy. More often we talk about the gains of team work. If we agree that competition ignites innovation, is there a place then for competition in the spirit and letter of teaming? It sounds like a contradiction, isn’t it? Competition is not bad but a lot has to do with the motive of the competitor to determine the end goal. For competition that is well intended, there is usually an unspoken component that tends towards collaboration. Ubuntu is a Zulu language. It simply translates to “I am because you are”. It means humanity towards others. Ubuntu means togetherness. If you like, you can call it collaboration over competition.
Empowerment is a commonly used word that I believe should provoke a discourse to avoid misuse. For an undiscerning mind, I fear that enslavement could be mistaken for empowerment. If you are successful, it is most likely that you want your children to take after you. It is also likely that you would prefer your children don’t make the mistakes you made on your path to success. If we all agree that the road to success is laden with missteps and mistakes, expecting your child to do things the way you did it is like saying s/he should also make the mistakes you made. Don’t forget that your child is not you. As you raise your children, you may, unknowingly, erase their sense of good judgment if you don’t allow them exercise their independence of mind, even when at variance with yours. Empowerment is not limited to giving your child the best education. It includes allowing the education to count when your child is able to question your judgement when s/he needs you to rationalise your reasoning.
Akin is an inspirational writer and author. He has published three books. He is a teacher and trainer. Through his daily teachings, he has helped a lot of people discover their potential.